Where is it written that we can no longer have intense, wild sex as we get older? If passion is the name of your game, don’t let a number be the thing that throws you off it.
That said, every part of your body likely doesn’t work or feel quite the same way it did when you were younger, so you shouldn’t expect or try to make your sex life the same, either. And let’s emphasize: we’re talking about your sex life changing, not diminishing. A lifetime of experience—and years of shared intimacy for long-term couples—can lead you to intensely passionate sex. You may just want to keep a few concepts and positions in mind.
This is an ideal position for many senior partners. If you experience pain or difficulty standing for long periods or leaning backward, then the flexion of this position may bring some relief to your back and your hips. Spooning is perfect for intimate sex that doesn’t require aggressive movement of the lower back and hips.
• Since spooning sex lends itself to a gradually building climax, using a toy that stimulates and heightens sensation can be a lot of fun. Consider trying a cock ring, anal beads, or nipple clips.
Modified Doggie Style
This classic can be adapted to lessen the pressure and agility needed to perform it. To modify this position, have the receiving partner kneel in front of the bed, with a pillow beneath their knees and their belly and chest pressed firmly into the bed. This will ease the pressure on their hips and back, and makes use of the bed for stability. You can also place a pillow underneath the forehead for additional support.
• Using a doggie-style strap allows you to use your arms, more than your hips, to create the thrusting motion. If this modified position creates too much pressure on either partner’s knees, try the next three positions.
Both partners should lie down on their backs, nestled closely side-by-side. Then, the receiving partner should throw one leg over their partner’s and position themselves at an angle that allows for entry. This position takes a lot of stress off of the lower back and shoulders.
• If you find it difficult to keep your leg or foot in one position, consider cuffs and a tether to help keep your leg secure and stable.
The Hot Seat
We mentioned this position as an excellent option for wheelchair sex because it allows for deeper penetration while using the chair for stability and comfort. You should sit in the chair, with your back flush against the backrest for support, and have your partner sit on your lap, with their legs and feet over yours. Your partner can use the armrests for stability and control the angle, speed, and depth of your sex. Any chair or seat in your home with a firm base and a straight back can be used for this position.
• If you want to add in a toy, we suggest a bondage kit, which comes with soft restraints and a blindfold. Some couples enjoy the thrill of blindfolding and tying one partner to the chair while the other controls everything they feel.
If you have joint pain or osteoporosis, sex that requires you to squat your knees or be on all fours can be painful. Standing sex eases stress on the knees and back. Try standing with your back to your partner, and your upper body supported by leaning against a wall or a ledge (a kitchen or bathroom counter with a pillow for your elbows can provide a lot of support). Your partner can enter you from behind while reaching ahead to use the same ledge or wall for support.
• A suction handle is a wonderful aid for standing sex, both in and out of the shower. You can attach the handle to the wall or ledge you and your partner are using for an extra secure support system.
Whether in the hands, wrists, knees or feet, arthritis can often prove an obstacle to sex and intimacy. Alternate positions that reduce the need for using affected joints can go a long way towards making sex more accessible and enjoyable.
Back pain can make nearly everything you do more difficult, especially something as physical as sex. But it doesn’t have to erase possibilities. Dealing with back pain in sex is like dealing with it everywhere: you accommodate. You find ways to still have great, mutually-satisfying intercourse. We can help with that.
Stress, heart disease, aging: there are many factors in erectile dysfunction, which is why over half of all men experience either short- or long-term ED. But with hollow strap-ons, anal explorer kits, beads, and more, there doesn’t need to be a loss of activity in the bedroom.
General Joint or Muscle Pain
Any of a number of ailments or injuries can cause (acute or chronic) joint and muscle pain, resulting in some sex positions being more painful than others. Don't try to 'power through the pain'... seek out alternative positions or sex acts that can still satisfy, without aggravating your existing pain.
Hip replacement used to be synonymous with the end of activity, including sex. But that is no longer the case. Advances in hips—and in the sex toys that can make up for any loss of movement or balance—mean that surgery is no longer the end of a sex life, but a new beginning.
Being in a wheelchair doesn’t have to be a limitation to sexuality; in fact, it can open up whole new worlds of angles and positions. The chair itself can be incorporated kinkily and excitingly, and you and your partner can find whole new avenues of intimacy.
Sportsheets Sex Toys and Sexual Positioning Devices
Our First Bondage Kit
This kit comes with four comfortable, safe, and easy-to-use ankle/wrist cuffs that firmly anchor to your favorite chair, bench, or bed. Smooth hook & loop restraints around your partners' limbs, slip on the soft-as-satin blindfold and let the fun begin.
I Like It Doggie Style Strap
The I Like It Doggie Style Strap compresses the vaginal canal for a tighter sensation while giving greater access to the G-spot, eases wear and tear on love handles as you pull them close, and relieves stress on the lower back - resulting in a mutually satisfying and deepened experience. Ideal for couples dealing with injuries or fatigue in the hips, back, or knees,
Suction Handle Grip
A suction handle is a wonderful aid for standing sex, both in and out of the shower. You can attach the handle to the wall or ledge you and your partner are using for an extra secure support system.