Anastasia Steel and Christian Grey. An 18th-century French courtesan and Marquis de Sade. Or maybe a naughty school teacher and her college freshman stud.
Whatever your fantasy, Halloween can be a delicious opportunity to dip into fantasy play and explore your wilder sexual side.
“Halloween is the perfect launching pad for experimenting with fantasy,” says certified sex therapist, creator of the blog and YouTube show Sex Esteem®. “If it’s the first time experimenting with fantasy play, I would encourage them to do it playfully and mindfully so that they agree to create roles that are the least anxiety provoking at first.”
Cooper says some couples may be ready to dive deep into fantasy play as a dominatrix and her subject, but some might want to play it safer with something along the lines of a lion tamer with a whip and a lion with a collar. The key is to let your imagination go wild and use the experience as an opportunity to grow together as a couple. The planning can be half the fun.
“Fantasy play allows each partner to see and respond to an aspect of the other that is not always acceptable to express in their everyday life - their jobs, their family roles or how they interact with friends,” Cooper says. “It also can heighten erotic excitement.”
Once they’ve figured out their roles and costumes, Cooper invited couples to go “all in” with the fantasy.
“Play your roles with a serious intent so the fun is fulfilled,” she says. “Really invest emotionally to the roles and fantasy so that you fully feel what it’s like in that role and so your partner can truly relate to you in another, new light.”
And after you’ve lived out your hot Halloween fantasy? Talk about it with your partner. How did each of you feel in your roles? What turned you on the most? What would you do differently next time? And, of course, when can you do it again!