I’ll let you in on a little secret of mine: I used to be terrible at communicating with my partner. Introverted by nature and a little shy, I didn’t know how to ask for what I wanted. I barely knew what it was I even wanted, and I hesitated to admit it for fear that it would make me seem inadequate somehow. I wanted to be perfect for him. I wanted to be perfect, period.
It didn’t take long for me to realize something wasn’t right, though it took me a bit longer to pinpoint exactly what that something was. The problem wasn’t really my lack of expertise—it was that I wasn’t allowing myself to trust in my partner or our relationship enough to open up to him about something that, though it felt private to me, was deeply affecting both of us and our time together. Relationships, of course, are built on trust—and the only way to build that trust is through open communication.
When couples attempt to resume sex postpartum, the problems that may arise usually aren’t due to a loss of physical or emotional attraction. In fact, couples may be more in love than ever after the birth of a baby. However, between caring for the new baby and trying to deal with changes in your body and your relationship, it can be hard to know exactly when or how to get your sex life back on track.
It’s not that women don’t want to engage in sex postpartum—it’s that couples need to work together to rekindle their connection.
Sometimes, if you are suffering from chronic or acute joint or muscular pain, sex can be unpleasant, difficult, or even impossible. The pain of getting into the right position, thrusting, and moving in a natural rhythm with your partner increases existing discomfort. For people suffering from these conditions, sex might not seem worth it.
To us, that’s unacceptable.
Getting out of the military is hard. By the time you’ve reached your end of active duty you’ll have spent years around people who dress the same, went to the same basic training, worked the same or a similar job, and understood even the most obscure jokes you made about military life. Coming home can make you feel like you’ve become a stranger.
And when you’ve been wounded in combat, vulnerability can be even harder to embrace. However, there are steps you can take to accept and embrace your situation, to thrive in this ‘new normal.’ There are ways to reconnect with your partner (and yourself) and accept intimacy.
Even without kids, it can be hard for married couples sometimes to break the routine and try something new in bed. Not everyone is going to check into a sex dungeon for the weekend, or turn their apartment into a Den of Erotic Mysteries. But the alternative to that isn’t another night of bickering about what to watch on Netflix.
Married couples want to break the routine and begin to experiment, without having to rearrange their lives. Routine breaking can be easily done, sparking passion, making every day a little better, and maybe leading to more adventures together in the bedroom.
You don’t need a dungeon. You just need these six best toys to spice up sex for married couples.
It’s Friday morning, but not just any Friday morning. Tonight is date night. You’ve had this day planned for a while; you’ve already gotten your sex toy “date in a box” kit. There are no phones, the kids are with mom, maybe you’re going to dinner, maybe not. The whole goal of this date night is to have time alone together.
And, needless to say, to spend that time twined in and around each other’s bodies as much as possible.
But it’s still morning. It’s 8:00 AM. You’re rushing to get to work. You have, like, at least 10 hours before you can taste each other again. How will you make it through the day?
These eight tips will help you use those hours at work for naughty intimacy, surrounded by people who have no idea what is roiling inside you. There’s nothing more delightful than being in a cloud of your own sexual energy while the world passes by. Get ready for tonight.
The road to recovery after hip replacement surgery can be long and challenging. It’s no surprise that patients become eager to get back to their old lives and routines and often struggle to adapt to their new—though temporary—physical limitations.
These limitations include those surrounding intimacy with partners. While recovery can take up to an entire year, that is a very long time to wait to resume relations. And as it turns out, love really can’t wait. And shouldn’t have to.
The most important thing to keep in mind, throughout the healing process, is to be patient with your partner and yourself. Intimacy is all about empathy, and if you or your partner are recovering from surgery, that need for empathy and understanding only increases. Remember, these limitations will pass. You can still enjoy intimacy… and pleasure. And until you are fully recovered, you can still have hot, passionate, steamy sex. Who knows? Maybe you’ll find a position or toy that brings you and your partner amazing new ways to orgasm.
The path back to healthy sexuality may be complex, but quadriplegia doesn’t have to prevent you from having an active and full sex life.
Almost anyone who has experienced any degree of paralysis can tell you that friends often share questions about your disability once they feel close enough to ask. And when the braver friends have exhausted their polite questions—Do you feel any pain?—they sometimes get down to the questions they’ve wanted to ask, but propriety prevented them: Can you still have sex? Do you enjoy it?
The short answer? Yes, and yes.