You never forget your first time, but most people don't remember their second. And this isn't just about sex (although, really, it's mostly about sex). You probably don?t remember your second day at a job, second car, second date...

Unless something spectacular happens at one of them (like if the second date is the first time), your second everything is usually the first step toward forgetfulness. It's where things start to blend in. That's just human nature.

We're happy to report, though, that sex toys are the exception to the rule. Your second sex toy purchase may be even more important than your first. I remember very well buying my first vibrator, and chances are, your first sex toy purchase was probably a vibrator, too. But what is your second one going to be?

There's a reason why the second toy is so important: you're taking another step toward discovering what sexual experiences really turn you on, and what really makes you excited. You are making decisions beyond 'this feels good', and toward 'this is who I want to be, sexually'.

So what should your second sex toy purchase be? Well, that can depend on what your vibrator taught you about yourself.

The Teaching Power of a Vibrator (and what comes next)

I don't want to give the impression that a vibrator is just, like, a starter sex toy, or something that you should graduate from. Lord knows I still use mine a lot.

(A lot).

The great thing about your first vibrator is that it gives you a chance to explore yourself, either solo or with your partner. It creates new sensations and allows you to feel things from angles that you might not be able to through normal penetrative sex.

So after some exploration with your vibrator, you may be ready to try something new. What your second sex toy should be, depends on what ideas your vibrator has sparked.

It's not just angles, either. When a vibrator is your first sex toy, you start to understand that sex can be so much bigger, so much more playful, and so much more exciting than you had thought. There are a million avenues to go down. There are a million paths.

A vibrator was your buzzing dowsing wand, leading you to deeper pleasures and more exciting intimacy. What road will you follow?

The Path of Heightened Sensations

The first time I used a vibrator I was more surprised than anything. It was like, "Oh! I didn't know I could feel this! Oh, my!" It was heightened and intense; it was unexpected and fricative. And as exciting as that was, it made me realize that I wanted it even more heightened.

That's what a blindfold did for me. While I love being blindfolded due to the surprise, the anticipation, and the intimacy, it's also true that not being able to see makes your other senses more intense. This includes touch and certainly includes sexual sensations.

Since you can't see, you are more attuned to your body. You are focusing on how it feels. You don't have distractions. It's darkness, and the touch of your partner. If having a vibrator has shown you that you want to keep amping up sensations, a blindfold is a great option for your second sex toy.

The Path of New Sensations

Of course, you might not just be about heightening sensations you've already felt. For many people, exploring with a vibrator shows them that they want to try new feelings, that are often a result of new angles. Positioning your body differently allows for new angles of penetration, and exploring them can help you feel sensations you haven't felt before.

There are a million different positions, but one that women often find produces exciting new sensations is doggie style. For many women, being taken from behind is the perfect way to reach the g-spot. For some people, this isn't a natural position, and for people with knee or back problems it can be difficult, but a strap created specifically to aid with doggie style helps keep the partners literally connected.

That doesn't work for everyone, and not every woman has her g-spot stimulated from doggie style. For some, there needs to be more of a downward angle with their legs up and around their partner (or above their own head). That particular angle can be helped with a G-Spot Link - a pair of cuffs and a buckle that helps keep your legs exactly where you want them. This also helps to prevent leg fatigue while your partner is stimulating your g-spot. Sound good?

The Path of New Openings

One of my friends once told me that as soon as she started exploring with a vibrator, she really started exploring, touching it all over her body. And she realized - hey, I think I might be into anal! At the very least, it made her more curious and open to that possibility. She wasn't totally ready for thrusting penetrative sex though, and her girlfriend was sort of leery about it as well, so they started with anal beads.

Beads are a great introduction to anal pleasures because you can put them in as much or as little as you want, and they stay in. There isn't (or doesn't have to be) thrusting, but instead they tickle your prostate while you are having vaginal sex, being orally pleasured, masturbating, or anything else. You can explore with a partner or on your own. It is totally up to you.

The Path of Tightened Sensations

The only problem with a vibrator, unless someone is manipulating it for you, is that it takes up at least one hand. That's one less hand to play with other parts, and if you're like me, you're bummed that you can only play with one nipple at a time.

That's where nipple clamps come in. I always liked playing with mine (or having someone else do it), because I love the sensation, but during the act hands sometimes go elsewhere and everywhere. That's why I was so happy when I bought nipple clamps, since I could have that slightly-painful/deeply-pleasurable feeling at all times, whether I was with my partner or by myself.

I personally like the nipple clamps with a pearl chain, a long metal one that makes an increasingly-frantic clatter as we speed up. But there are different nipple clamps and clips for everyone, so find one (or more!) that are right for you.

The Path of Doing It In The Shower

Your vibrator might make you realize that sex is something that can happen anytime and anywhere - after all, you can bring it just about everywhere. Did you know you can even bring it in the shower, in a soap sponge? And did you know you can even bring someone else in the shower with you?

You know, for sex?

Sex in the shower is exciting, naughty, unexpected, and fun. It can also seem hard, and maybe a bit slippery (the innuendo here writes itself!). But to take out the risk of falling, we've attached suction foot rests and suction handle bars, giving us something to grip onto and brace ourselves with while we enjoy the steam of the water and the heat of the shower - and each other.

Don't Let The Buzz Wear Away

A vibrator is fun and exciting, and if you are like me, a lifetime friend. But you don't have to stop there. Your vibrator can show you that there are so many ways to enjoy sex, ways you may never have thought of. Or, ways you have thought of, but never imagined you could explore.

So go get that second sex toy. Get something you want to try, something that matches the feelings awakened in you. I promise you'll remember it with the same passion and giddy thrill as you remember your first.